Why don’t hiring companies choose you?
Maybe if you had found someone who introduced you to the companies they hire it would have gone differently, but you don’t know how to contact the right people, so your thought was never followed by action.
You go on like this for some time trying to keep this strange balance you have imposed on yourself. “Yes, come on, the situation is not that bad, you will see that it will improve” you repeat continuously trying to convince yourself.
When you learn that other people are in the same difficult working condition as you, you begin to feel unusual satisfaction. You feel sorry for them of course, but the fact that the number of disadvantaged increases allows you to self-acquit yourself for the lack of action.
Something happens one day that changes this condition. A person you know gets a new job. It covers exactly the kind of job and company you could have found.
You are still wary that it will change but after all the effort you are doing to deceive yourself is always so great that you decide to do something. Call this person and ask him to explain how he did it.
You find that instead of lining up and throwing hopes of success on the big pile of standard CVs in response to job advertisements from hiring companies, he preferred to go only where he felt qualified.
This allowed him to get a direct interview although these companies were apparently not looking for new employees.